a moment

"man is like a breath;
his days are like a passing shadow."
~Psalm 144:4

it seems like the last two years have gone by in the blink of an eye. i'm not sure that i've done much good in that time. i believe that God can use even the poor things of my life for His glory, but if you took it on the whole, i feel like ephesian church in Rev. 2, knowing doctrine and striving for truth, but having lost my first love.

i randomly found an old note from last summer from a piper sermon on Romans 1 and the divide between eternal life and death. this kind of truth jerks me back into reality when i am lulled to sleep by my comfortable american life. it reminds me that my time is short.

and it's slipping away.

my grandmother is 89 years old. i visit her a few days a week for a half-hour or so, to break up her day in the nursing home with some company. i could say a lot about that, but one thing God has granted me through this is to really hate dying, the wasting away of life. and i know, death has lost it's sting because of victory in Christ. but death per se is still evil. it ought not be. it is the result of a sinful, fallen world. and one day, it will be no more, when sin is no more.

but for now, it's coming.

and i need to live in light of that. i need to be proactive. i need not to lose myself to the comfortable, fun things of this world. if i don't move now, i won't get where i'm going. it won't just happen; it's not inevitable. i refuse to stay where i am, for if i do, i disqualify myself. God's glory and my joy in Him are at stake. eternal things are in the balance.

it's time to move.

God, help me.

transition

these next few weeks will be very interesting. i'll be leaving college, after having classes almost non-stop since last summer, and will be missing a ton of people who are coming back for the fall, and some who never left. i'm really excited for the recent grads of the youth group, and i need to remember to keep them in my prayers as they go off to something new as well. i'm learning once again to let go, which i can't say that i like, but i'm learning more and more how awesome it is that God's in charge, writing a story better than i ever could. i'm excited for spending a few weeks at home. i miss casey an awful lot, even though we talk quite a bit, so it'll be great to spend a few days with her. it's been weird only be spending a week or two here and there at home, as opposed to at least normal summers, let alone pre-college days. i'm really looking forward to spending some quality time with the fam. i miss them a lot, too. and the bunch of friends back home. i'm learning to make the little time that we have quality time. and a little time is all we have. i'm getting excited for the fall. i'll be working at tangibl, a small engineering firm north of philly, so i'll putting what i've learned into practice, and making money for it, so that'll be nice. i'll be living with my uncle and aunt, which will be good, and save me rent. i'll be interning at my cousin's church, which will be awesome, and hopefully learning some greek. so it's looking good. bittersweet, as always. i'm in one of those thoughtful moods, i suppose. listened through resolved, too, so thoughts of eternity factor in somewhere. it's pretty crazy, but God is good, so i don't have to know or understand how all this works out, i just know it does. He is so good, He is always faithful, and thank God that He's in control. more to come.